Anxiety: The Dictator We Elect
On usurping our internal government
Thanks to all the recent subs since the last article on the appeal of trading/crypto, linked here.
While likening anxiety to a dictator may feel like comparing a Shih Tzu to a wolf, they’re not so different in their purpose. But, how do dictators rise in the first place?
Julius Caesar became the world’s first dictator in 44 B.C.E when he stepped into the Roman Senate and declared himself dictator for life. Prior to this, Caesar had an impressive resume from serving as the governor of Gaul, gaining immense military support and riches along the way. Along with some foxy political moves such as building relationships with Rome’s wealthiest men, the stage was set for Caesar to become dictator. He had the power, the pull, and all the necessary prerequisites. If any ordinary Roman waltzed into the senate and declared themselves dictator, they would be laughed all the way to the latrine.
But Caesar’s tools and resume were only enough to get him the position, he had no guarantee that the Roman citizens would accept him as their dictator. He was only successful because he earned the love of the Roman people.
Caesar first garnered love on the battlefield. He conquered Gaul, an area known to the modern world as France, and parts of Belgium and Germany, which drastically expanded the empire. He then defeated the most powerful man in Rome, Pompey, in a civil war as Pompey believed Caesar had gained too much favor and was now a political threat. From there, he conquered Northern Africa and had a child with Cleopatra, opening up exclusive tradelines with Egypt which brought Romans great wealth.
This glory meant a lot to Romans and increased nationalism, but that was not all Caesar offered them. He also:
Reduced debt & unemployment
Redistributed lands to the poor
Offered jobs to the poor to work in Rome’s overseas colonies
Granted citizenship to foreigners living in Rome
Constructed a new harbor, canal, Senate house, and the Forum Julius
Left his riches to be divided among each Roman citizen in his will
When Caesar was stabbed 23 times by senators, his citizens were devastated, sparking a series of civil wars until Caesar’s legal son, Augustus, rose as the emperor of Rome. In fact, being co-signed by Caesar is the main reason Augustus was able to rise to power and restore order.
Caesar may have had all the tools to gain power, but his efforts to ensure the security of his citizens and improve their well-being were why he garnered enough favor to be accepted as dictator.
The love-for-power trade isn’t exclusive to Caesar, dictators rise when they promise vulnerable citizens that they will drastically improve their well-being. Hitler’s popularity rose in the wake of the one-two punch of hyperinflation and the Great Depression which decimated the average German’s livelihood. Mussolini rose as he promised to put Italians first amidst social and economic disorder. Stalin’s communism became accepted as a path to elevate Russia from the impoverished peasant society it was at the turn of the 20th century. Stalin was even viewed as a father to his citizens.
Our dictator above all promised to hold their citizens’ hands through times of uncertainty, just as humans have anxiety which makes the same promise. Anxiety comes to us in our dark times and starts to guide us toward safety.
This pursuit of preservation is what allowed anxiety to get passed down through evolution. It was what made our ancestors think “hmm, maybe I should hide from that lion over there” or “hmm, I don’t know that berry, let me not eat it”.
Now it says “hmm, I saw that person on Instagram and we follow each other, but I’m not going to say hi, just in case they don’t recognize me”. Or “hmm, rather have my fingers bleed from smashing the ‘close elevator’ button than engage in small talk”.
It’s like having a little helper inside your head, advising you to make the right decision. But remember, that Stalin was once a mere secretary and Mussolini an edgy journalist, imagine if we listened to all the edgy journalists out there? Wait, we do? Anyways.
Most would agree that anxiety is no longer a friendly secretary and that it’s taken a more controlling role in their life. Perhaps to that of a dictator, butting in on every decision and causing discomfort when you fail to comply.
Similarly to our dictators above, anxiety doesn’t just come barging through our brain’s Senate and start forcing us to take orders. Instead, it’s a slow rise to power in which the roots are nourished with the belief that listening is in our best interest. Although it’s as blindly as Russians choosing to rally around Stalin, we very much choose our anxiety to lead us out of a thornbush into a meadow.
The notion of choosing anxiety isn’t meant to say that it’s easy to turn off, it’s not. It’s to explain that falling into the trap is just so easy.
Anxious thinking functions as any habit would, controlling our decisions as regularly as stoplights on a boulevard. It also follows the cue, routine, and reward feedback loop for habit reinforcement.
Let’s run through an example of how this looks in practice. Say our Roman friend Marcellus from above showed up to mythology class wearing a hideous pink toga. All the little roman schoolchildren mocked him and pulled at his toga with condescending giggles. Marcellus had no other togas to wear so he decided he wouldn’t return to the school until he could afford a new one. Finally, after shoveling enough hay for a local farmer, Marcellus could afford a cool, new, white toga. He confidently walked into school, but nobody even noticed. Marcellus didn’t care that nobody pointed out his fresh new fit, he was just glad not to be seen.
Now, because Marcellus responded to his fear of being ridiculed and received the reward of safety, he will be more careful to follow the customs of his peers. Maybe when all the little Roman schoolboys wear some Air Jesus 12s, he’ll also work to buy them, but not for their sole support. And maybe now he won’t speak up when he disagrees with popular opinions. He won’t try his hand at Roman sports such as cockfighting and hoop rolling since he knows that effort can lead to failure, which leads to ridicule, and it’s just easier to fit in.
Marcellus is a mild example, but these habits are common. Consider a student that decided to go on his phone to distract himself from studying and found liquid dopamine through the needles of the interwebs. Maybe this student will deal with stressors in the future by escaping reality.
There are other small examples of how dealing with anxiety by submission hinders us, but the above examples typically don’t evolve to the point in which they’re crippling. They’re still Mussolini in his shouting-in-the-air phase, annoying but not quite a life-altering problem, and definitely not a dictator.
Anxiety barges into the hall of the Senate when it starts using this feedback loop on itself.
Marcellus and the student are anxiously dealing with problems that are in their control. Anxiety starts violently looping over itself when we try to gain control of situations that are uncontrollable.
Dictators too have an insatiable hunger for control, acting ruthlessly when it becomes harder to come by. Stalin killed over 20 million of his own citizens as he ruthlessly fought for control of discourse and the economy. Mussolini and Hitler’s aggression created the bloodiest war in the modern era, powered by their hopes of controlling the entire world.
Control is what gives dictators their title, can’t be a dictator if you have little to dictate!
In anxiety’s quest for control, the only blood spilled is our own through worrying. Psychiatrist Judson Brewer outlines how worrying can make us feel in control of uncontrollable situations:
And some research has shown that worrying tends to make people feel like they’re in control, even if they’re not, or at least doing something, even if they don’t have control over a situation, doing something feels more productive than not doing anything.
The act of worrying — which just makes the anxiety worse — acts as the routine in response to a cue. Brewer goes on the explain why it also becomes a reward:
It’s rewarding to our brain to say, “Hey, you’re worrying. At least you’re doing something.” And that reward feeds back and tells our brain, “Hey, next time you’re anxious, you should worry some more.”
From here, anxiety snowballs. Now, when faced with another cue of an uncontrollable situation, your brain will be more inclined to worry. But, because it was reinforced with a positive feedback loop, there will be more worrying this time. And so on, this pattern continues and anxiety consolidates more power with each turn of the wheel.
There are three things certain in life: death, taxes, and dictators imploding. Either by stepping on their own landmine or taking a freedom bomb to the face. Humans have the evolutionary superpower of free will and are valiant beings, destroying those who try to harvest our freedom.
Although anxiety may have become our personal dictator, we can usurp them and take the halls of the Senate back for ourselves.
Habit loops require our inputs, we can always change them. Obviously, this is a lot easier said than done as anxiety can be a tireless opponent. Yet, the blueprint is there. Say no, hold the door, and do things that are good for you like taking a walk in the sun. Fight the voice in your head as courageously as our ancestors who overthrew their dictators.
Even if we make progress, it will be just as easy to fall back into anxiety’s deceptive arms as it once was. Citizens of ex-dictator states deal with a similar problem. A 2019 poll found that 51% of Russians respect, like, or admire Stalin. As time passes, the atrocities he committed become forgotten, and whatever pride he brought to Russians becomes overinflated. Of course, this is exasperated by the terrible time Russians have had under Putin. But it’s important to remember what dictators bring if we give them power, and we must reject the easy but unwise option when unhappiness looms.
Although anxiety will never leave us and the battle may never end, we have nothing to lose by fighting it.
Even if we fail tremendously, the potential of freedom is worth it.
This now marks my third post in two months in which I mention Caesar, not sure if that’s good or bad.
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